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Archive for June, 2008

friends

it has been a trying period these recent 2 plus wks. at times, it got so bad that i felt like i was drowning…but my good friends, esp one of them who could really empathise with me, sustained me. Most, in fact almost all, of my close friends are introverts. In times like these, when true friends stand by you to support you, the friendship goes on to a deeper level. & i really am so thankful to God for giving me these special people (or person) to encourage & assure & just be there for me. The peak of the difficult period has past (i think & i so dearly hope so!) but isn’t over yet.

God has been so gracious & patient. It’s a long journey and everyday i’m hoping more and more to reach the end soon. 50 years more or less.

anyway, a new life awaits me in august =) next mth, i’ll prepare for the new beginning – new opportunities & exciting experiences & of course, the most impt & what i’m really looking forward to, is forming new friendships. the really deep ones. just 2 or 3 is sufficient, like in JC =)

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Hit a real, real bad LOW over the weekend. Still recovering from it but not going too well. Thankful for those who have helped me through it. I wanna snap out of it once and for all, but it seems impossible. Perhaps it would be the cross that i would have to carry for the rest of this earthly life. Thinking of such things in the light of eternity helps – like why care or bother so much about it when everything here is fleeting! it passes us by & over the years, the sharpness/ acuteness (correct word??) of the experience/s fade. So is it worth my energy and my time? Lately, the qn on whether certain things are worth my time and effort come surfacing in my mind. Personally, i face the world with fear. When i look back and see the path that i’ve trodden on & towards where i’m heading (which is to nowhere in particular), i shudder in fear at times.

Oh no, i’m feeling even more blue now than when i’d started.

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Cycles

Always can’t think of an apt title!

Fashion is one thing that goes in circles, yesterday’s trends (some only) can become trendy today or tomorrow. Life itself is a cycle, the same thing has been repeated numerous-millions of- times: baby, student, get married, have a family, retire, enjoy/ suffer, die. But I didn’t know that even agriculture has its cycle. Today’s newspapers reported about an increase in urban farmers with the rise in inflation and the increasing food prices. And these urban farmers in America, Britain, The Philippines etc. are not just retirees but professionals and even students! Many, many people across the world are feeling the pinch of the rising food prices & the rising oil prices due to accelerating demand, that some are turning to growing their own produce. Just last Wed, I bought mee chang kuih from Jolibean & didn’t look at the price (hungry, so i only had eyes for the food 😉 ). I paid $1 and stood there waiting for a 30-cent change, until the stallholder told me “qi3 jia4 le4 [price has increased]”. And the kuih was smaller than usual. If I, in an advanced country like Singapore, can feel the small little pinch, I really can’t imagine how the people in poor, backward countries are managing. Then after reading the Forum page in today’s Straits Times, I even considered becoming a vegetarian – but only for a few minutes :p But seriously, 70% of the grain goes to rearing the poultry, and if we could reduce this by going vegetarian, it will help reduce demand for grain/ rice and hence the price. This would also allow the grain to feed the poor, assuming the poor have access to it (which is not true). Haha thought of having one or two vegetarian days in a wk.

Today is still early June, soon I’ll have to drop all my tuition assignments & RCIA too. Hopefully, i can still go for RCIA occasionally 🙂 just to encourage the cathechumens 🙂 Well, one thing for sure, I’ll definitely be there for the big events, esp. the baptism! So looking forward to it!! Haha but it’s in Dec.. Well, nearly half the year is gone & there’ve already been several exciting changes, unexpected blessings, new experiences, new friendships & some old ones that have gone deeper =)

The Lord has showered me with rich blessings 🙂 blessed beyond my expectations and my imagination 🙂 I am now sure that this is the path that He wants me to take – it is His Will. Although I can forsee quite a lot of stress in the next few years, I know and trust that He’ll bring me through it as this is His Plan. 🙂

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
[ Jeremiah 29:11 ]

 

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