Archive for October, 2007

Jesus Had a Little Lamb

First, I’ll destress. It’s so soon and i’m getting jumpy all over because I haven’t finished revising! Of course, I’m scared of screwing it all up just like my ‘O’ Levels and then have to live with deep regret and disppointment. Haiz…I wished I’d been more hardworking, not always talking and talking away, wasting all my time =x I wished I’d been more active in my CCA, and not being so unenthu. always =s
Haiz…. What’s the point of “I wish” now…
Productivity level is like so low (using JC’s table: how many “slack” slots out of the 37 in total) I’m so scared…..


Core: forgotten at least half although I’ve finished it once through [Quite dead]
Application: haven’t even touched! [Very dead!]
Prelim papers: only did MCQs !!

Chem: going to buy TYS today and must re-revise the notes again [but should have enough time]
Math: revise the notes and do some tough (or unconventional) qns on the eves [should have enough time]
Econs: Don’t even talk about it! [Extremely dead]
GP: practised some compres but I dunno how to study for the essay and I can’t remember the facts [Quite dead]

However, the first year of the new syllabus is usually marked leniently. Oh well, there are two sides to the coin (just like GP, always can flip somehow). Nevertheless, the revision factor far outweighs the lenient marking factor (weigh the factors like econs). Oh, whatever.

There has been a spate of good news recently 🙂 Good for my parents 🙂 Can see that they are happier and less worried about us… hee hee… but I’m scared I would break the chain of good news. (NOOOOO….!!)

Anyway, I was studying in NJC library on Thursday when the song “Mary had a little lamb” came to mind. Then, I thought of the parable of The Good Shepherd, so the song changed to:

Jesus had a little lamb,
Little lamb, little lamb,
Jesus had a little lamb,
Its fleece was white as snow
And everywhere that Jesus went,
Jesus went, Jesus went,
Everywhere that Jesus went
The lamb was sure to go

….[a few other verses]…

“Why, Mary Jesus loves the lamb, you know.”
Loves the lamb, you know, loves the lamb, you know
“Why, Mary Jesus loves the lamb, you know.”
The teacher did reply



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14 Days and counting…

I’ve been trying to control myself from blogging or even coming online. But there are so many things that have stored inside that I want to let some of it out.

Well, yesterday was farewell assembly. It was quite touching especially during the video, but i told myself not to think too much into it as I was afraid that it would affect my mood for studying subsequently. (I tend to think too much, brooding over things for too long, so I braced myself for yesterday.) So, anyway, i enjoyed the farewell assembly. The progress report was just a mixture of feelings, gp was so good and bio was down in the dumps. urgh…but I also had braced myself for that too, yea, so not very affected by it. I just know that there are two things/ person that matter in my life right now. Everything else is not urgent or not necessary at the moment. Of course one of them is the ‘A’ Levels itself. The other is the purpose of sitting for ‘A’ Levels, the purpose of studying, the purpose of even living—Jesus. He keeps me going. It is only these days or these weeks that I’ve found the joy of prayer. The song “What a Friend we have in Jesus” took a deeper meaning recently, especially the lines “oh what peace we often forfeit! oh what needless pain we bear! All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.” So meaningful, and what truth in them! I suddenly felt that I had been so stupid all along! Anything that makes you worried, frustrated, sad or indignant, just pray! Just tell the Lord! Never mind if it sounds like complaining or grumbling or like a spoilt, whiny child, or like a petulant child pleading and tugging on His sleeve, He never tires of hearing our prayers. 🙂

I thank God for my results, I really, really (to the power of 1000) mean it when I say that He is the One Who has given me these grades. Every single paper done under His care and guidance, with the Holy Spirit’s Inspiration. The final lap is here. I’m rushing for time, yet i don’t feel a sense of urgency. Gah…ok, enough about myself.

On to the next topic. This week’s Newsweek had this article on Charles Sch……(forgot how to spell), the creator of the comics strip, Peanuts. He’s an interesting character… He actually wanted himself to be depressed as it is from his grief and depression that he draws his inspiration from. He would dwell on an unpleasant incident for a long time (e.g. being jilted by a red-haired girl) and refused to seek psychiatric treatment for his depression for inspiration’s sake. Yea, it’s kinda weird and interesting.

Other things in the news would be the increment of university places to 25% of the cohort by 2009 and 30% by 2011 (or is it 2012?) I wonder what the fourth university would be like and where it will be.

Oh, and yesterday or the day before yesterday there was this report on how Switerzerland has found a way to reduce its carbon emissions—by burning the sawed wood that people dispose of. It has since reduced carbon emissions by 30%. Hopefully, the other European countries would follow suit. Another article today is about the greater reliance on biofuels as a source for energy. More countries are moving away from fossil fuels to biofuels which is apparently more environmental friendly. (Biofuels come from plants.) However, this may not be that good because more plots of land in countries like Indonesia will have to burn the plots of land, resulting in haze in Singapore.

Wahaha…that’s the end of my trying to recall GP stuff! Urgh…looks like there are many gaps in my memory despite me having read this in the past few days only. In two weeks time, these facts would likely be gone. Biology is another big headache! Can’t get in! But i mustn’t give up!

Anyway, my holiday is already almost completely booked, save for a few days of breathing here and there. If I’d a choice, I won’t want it this way… =x But since I’ve made it, I’ll stick to it. Again, whatever happens, I’ll take it to the Lord in prayer 🙂 No, He’s not Santa Claus, but He’ll help in some way. 🙂

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Haha, that title looks so o.O deceiving, doesn’t it? 😉 Well, this first day wasn’t that successful. I really can’t stand it when I can’t meet the targets set in the morning which is a period of hope; as the day progresses, the hope fades gradually till only a glimmer of hope is left flickering towards sleeping time when u noe u can’t “rescue” your wasted day anymore. Haiz….and it’s a repeated cycle—at least 200 days a year, go do the math (saying to no one in general cos no one reads this.)

I think I’m a rather paradoxical character. I get stressed that I’m not stressed >.< siao right… It’s like a contradiction: I pray for peace, yet when I get that peaceful feeling in my heart, no doubt I savour it and am grateful for it, but no sooner do I get scared that I’m no longer gonna function at a reasonably high capacity >.< Oh boy… Haha, like how I can get really, REALLY HIGH & SIAO [even a chao lame (lame = unlaughable; eye-rolling; sweat-dropping, ku3 xiao4) joke can make me break into peals of hearty laughter! yet, I can get super melancholic, wallowing in all the sadness and brokenness of life. Can be quiet and have a longing of isolation at times, yet feel lonely and want to talk to someone. Can be impulsive and reactive at times (heart over head), yet rationale and level-headed in approaching most situations (I hope I’m right in this analysis:) ); head over heart. Hmmm….overall I’m too volatile lah…haha…anyway, I think alot of people, if not everyone, have paradoxical characters, only to what degree. Indeed, we are uniquely created 🙂

Yesterday I watched A Walk to Remember (yes, I know, I should’ve be staring at my bks! SLACKER!) and it was SOOOOOO… touching!! I wouldn’t mind being the girl that Mandy Moore plays if I’d such a sweet bf! lol. that’s wishful thinking 😉 anyway, I was thinking if it was meant to be a Hollywood movie with some light touches of Korean drama. hahaha…I also wondered why those with leukemia are only girls everytime! wrong impression ingrained into the minds of viewers! and this may lead to the misconception that females are the weaker sex…haha, but it’s just a show lah, so no need to bother so much : )  

URGH. I’m so deep in a mountain pile of work. But I know the assurance that no matter what happens, Someone will always be there to support me. So faithful and so true (: Blessed to have such a faithful friend (: but I’m so unfaithful and disloyal 😦  But i’ll try harder! hehe….see i’m optimistic now, unlike my innate pessimistic nature (?) haha, but then this is written under peaceful circumstances, my “boat” will only be shaken next week onwards, let’s see if the peace will still survive. Till then.

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